Oh God. I just had the weirdest dream. So it was during Senior year and it was the 2nd to last week of school and I dreamed of myself pouring my heart out to Marissa and telling her that I still wanted to be friends and keep in touch or some bullshit like that. What the fuck is wrong with me. Typed this up on my phone and don’t know how to put it in drafts, fuck it.
I’m losing touch with everyone I used to call my friends. It was an act of defense for me almost. A reaction. Knowing the time I have left, I retract myself from them so it hurts less when I finally have to leave. It’s a saddening fact. Instead of enjoying my summer with everyone as a group, I’m spending it with Julio and Wilfredo. Occasionally skating with Andrew, occasionally seeing Michael. It fell apart. The nice little ring of friends. Maybe it didn’t fall apart, maybe I just fell out of the loop. Man, it blows. Kyle’s off partying it up because I guess he’s been missing out for so long. I don’t know. I don’t see that many people. Holy shit I’m anti-social as fuck. Everything blows, I got a new phone and it’s fucking cool, but yeah. My skateboarding skills are detracting. I need to get off my stupid ass and commit. The same shit I tell Andrew. I need to commit, skate everyday. I’ll never get better if I don’t. It’s just so lonely, not having anyone to skate with. I’m so lonely and my days are numbered.
My phone somehow turned on in the middle of the night and ran a bunch of processes and overheated to like 80 degrees or something. And it woke me up this morning. It was like a fucking meteor. So I put it next to my cracked window and cooled it down. Then it wouldn’t turn on and I panicked so I googled the problem. I charged it for about 30 minutes and now it’s working phew..